joke everyday

雪绒花

A woman phoned her dentist when she received a huge bill.

"I'm shocked!" she complained.

"This is three times what you normally charge."

"Yes, I know," said the dentist. "But you screamed so loudly, you scared away two other patients."

雪绒花

One day in the great forest a magical frog was walking down to a water hole. This forest was so big that the frog had never seen another animal in all his life.

By chance today a bear was chasing after a rabbit to have for dinner. The frog called for the two to stop. The frog said "Because you are the only two animals I have seen, I will grant you both three wishes... Bear, you go first."

The bear thought for a minute, and being the male he was, said "I wish for all the bears in this forest, besides me, to be female." For his wish, the rabbit asked for a crash helmet, and immediately put it on.

The bear was amazed at the stupidity of the rabbit, wasting his wish like that. It was the bear's second turn for a wish. "Well, I wish that all the bears in the next forest were female as well." Rabbit asked for a motorcycle and immediately hopped on it and gunned the engine. The bear was shocked that the rabbit was asking for these stupid things, after all, he could have asked for money and bought the motorcycle.

For the last wish the bear thought for awhile and then said, "I wish that all the bears in the world, besides me, were female."

The rabbit grinned, gunned the engine, and said, "I wish that the bear was gay..."

雪绒花

A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in a theater. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, "Sorry, sir, but you're only allowed one seat." The man groaned but didn't budge. The usher became impatient.

"Sir," the usher said, "if you don't get up from there I'm going to have to call the manager."

Again, the man just groaned, which infuriated the usher who turned and marched briskly back up the aisle in search of his manager. In a few moments, both the usher and the manager returned and stood over the man. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move him, but with no success. Finally, they summoned the police.

The cop surveyed the situation briefly then asked, "All right buddy, what's your name?" "Sam," the man moaned. "Where ya from, Sam?" the cop asked.

And with pain in his voice, Sam replied, "The balcony."

lion

HOW GET IT ,XUE JJ?
COPY OR CREATE?

雪绒花

Copy, of course, do you think I am a facetious person?

lion

以下是引用雪绒花在2003-8-28 21:39:00的发言：
Copy, of course, do you think I am a facetious person?

I THOUGHT YOU ARE A NUT ,HO~~~,DON'T KICK ME [em21][em21][em21][em21]

雪绒花

What's the meaning of "nut", shizi?

lion

以下是引用雪绒花在2003-8-28 21:53:00的发言：
What's the meaning of "nut", shizi?

呆头呆脑，厚厚

雪绒花

I deem only the male lion could be intituled "呆头呆脑", do you think so?

lion

[quote]以下是引用雪绒花在2003-8-28 22:02:00的发言：
I deem only the male lion could be intituled "呆头呆脑", do you think so?

[/quot[em20][em20][em20][em20][em20]